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JaiJai
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Aftermath….
Posted On 09/15/2008 12:36:03
Aftermath….
thoughts
Just thoughts.....
About a past life
About a past wife
About a needy me
About someone who took a want over a need
About when days past and I did nothing but sleep
Knowing work would never go unless i got on my feet
About a guy who always needed somebody
But never could open up
Had a heart to cold for his body
Already thrown away the key
Whats wrong with me
Need something like a love rehab
A girl to fill that other half
But still contemplatin sittin on my ass
Thinkin....
About how it hurt
About what its worth
About the trouble it caused
About the simple things in life that I never really saw.
Forgot about my own past
Appreciatin nothing but material and cash
And that’s the world today
Poor to poor rich to rich
But it seems like they always got something to say
Too…greedy, sleazy, biased and coward,
Too…shady, lazy, crazy, they amaze me how
Even if they got a dollar or dime
Still complainin about work all the time and
Got their own neighborhood.
But still crime watchin for hoodlems.
And some are just misunderstood.
But its what’s got me stayin at home
In my room sittin all alone
Thinking….
About life tomorrow
About fears and sorrow
About the love of others
About my sisters and brothers.
About being that role model
The one that’ll teach about lifes battles
I would show you how to appreciate today and
Make sure we always pray
I would show you that He comes first and
Always look up to him when worst comes to worst.
And that’s what has me goin to church
Listenin to the word
Thinkin…just thinkin….
About a better me
How we all succeed
In bein the best we can be
About how life is just so E…Z…E
No need for lies
Or beatin on wives
No need to cheat
Look your skippin a beat.
I’ll take you to the basics
We are all one people
So quit being racist
I’m done with drama
So go back to your baby moma
Take care of your kid
Be a father be a man
Cus you don’t want em growin up thinkin they were a bastard child…Damn…
But I’m here just chillin
Just sittin on my ass
Watchin the days pass
Just thinkin……

Pain (uncleaned *no proofreading*)
Posted On 09/13/2008 12:26:20

Separate Pt. 2

I'm walkin by myself in a lonely dark hall
Thinkin about the old days before we took that fall
And I realize how precious that they really were
I learn my lesson now its over 
Please shoot me down before I love another.
Cus the pain I felt, wasn't really worth it.
And the things I did
Weren't even workin.
They say it takes so much to please a women.
But when you gotta put everything on the line.
I'd rather be jumpin.
To my death I'd fall cus in this world I have nothin.
And I fell so hard to this era of corruption.
 Lovers always stray from what they mean to say.
 Others always run from whats right in front of them
 Very little listen to what they're always missin
 Every time I speak my mind I feel crazy cus they say Im different.
But I've just been there done that
And I've seen that and seen that
And I've got to say that I'd rather go back
To when marriage really ment something
Those days when I love you was real and not crushing.
Where nothing changed but just her last name.
No secrets no faults.
Just understanding the game.
When it was 50/50 and none of this 20/80
Just get a hustle and tell me when your ready.
I've gone to far to take two steps back.
And already finished my base to play some jinga crap.
Its easy to preceive when you don't know
Yeah I was quiet,
But it doesn't mean Im creepin in someones back doh.
Faithful, Loyal, Honest
But I'm not always going to be on my knees yah highness.
Loving, Caring,  Daring
To be that one in a million cus if not I'm not trying.
And still you come at me with that left hand.
Cus your right was too weak to keep up with me.
Who you tryin to impress cause we're already there
Who you tryin to prove ain't no brownie points here.
Can't you see where we are.
I guess not cus your blind
got the right head for the times
But it ain't nothing if you don't have the right mind.
And I'm feelin pain.
Every time I speak to you.
I feel pain even when i think of you.
The times were good, the love was soso.
I think i'm through stressin so I'm showin you the front doh
You've got to go...


Separated pt.1
Posted On 09/11/2008 06:23:53
Separated pt.1
 
Seconds seem like hours and days seem like years,
I’m lost and cold, my eyes filled with tears,
My words filled with sorrow,
And my love is mixed with hate,
Cus lost my world and my life is gone,
When I said it was yours to take.
I guess it was just reality,
I guess it just finally got to me,
That final blow,
That last straw,
That kamikaze fatality,
So here we are as somewhat a 50/50,
But money was never an object,
And our hands were never filthy.
Love conquers all and its price has no value,
But when you put it second,
Its like taking off your rear view.
I loved you like no other,
I put you before my own brother,
Can’t believe my eyes were deceived,
By someone who’d rather drink and smoke weed.
Callin yourself a thug…
Sayin wuts good n one love.
Two faced Jekle,
In a one way settle,
No job no school no flock for your feather.
So I guess this is it,
Cus I need some room to breath,
My hearts still with you,
And I’d plead on my knees.
But if blood and water can’t fix it.
I guess this is where we need to be...

First Blog
Posted On 09/10/2008 11:23:21

First Blog!....where do i start...breath Jai breath...
As blank of a mind that I have I think I have alot to say.
One of those quiet minds that says what they need to say
when they need to say it, all else is just a thought right?
Wrong. Its what got me into this mess. Not speakin up, and
now those comercials from way back when echo in my head, "Let
your voice be heard." Cus i stayed quiet when I was told to
just listen...I just listened. As a kid all you do is listen to
what goes on around you. The wind that passes by, the raindrops
that fall, the glass that just broke upstairs, or the fight
thats goin on in your parents bedroom, you just listen,
watch and learn. Me...I never grew out of the phaze til bout 5 months
ago...talk about a late bloomer. But at that my mind just serinades
with thoughts of life, about reason, and about love. People
started callin me an old man with a young heart. Can't help
it if the only people I listened to actually went somewhere
in life...Anways, the greatest inspiration to anyone,
no matter what you think is always yourself. Stay true
stay cool, and be you and lrn2love yourself before you love
another is all I ask and that will get you through
even the toughest of times because in the end, all you have
is yourself. I mean don't be biased or selfish, but
just know that you only live once and if you can't jump
through hoops remember theres always more than one way
to get past em, so start climbing. I hate...im sorry I
dislike those who stop halfway because they claim
they can't make it, the fleuzy that only went cus
everyone else is doing it, copin out at the last minute
like everyone else is goin to pick up their load and
drag their carcass to the end...i'd rather watch paint dry
then to heave on some craped out beezy, wining about how
hard life is when they'v only went through half of it.
Damn life really is tough, but the average worker is only
going to get the average cent for the average quality.
There isn't nam else I can say but to keep movin
cus time doesn't stop cus you need to take a breath, life
moves on. Im breathin...




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